they need to just BURY HIM!
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize