That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
