...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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