i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
