capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
