I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
