There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
