Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
