would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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