well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize