just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Sext me about skeletons
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
