So drunk its hurt
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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