Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
