I faked an abortion last night.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
