i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
