worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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