oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
