trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
