There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
