Small penises have feelings too.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
