That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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