My nipple is on Facebook.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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