You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
