at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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