'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
