new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
