Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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