Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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