her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
