If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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