So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
