brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
