just tell him i said nine months
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Randomize