I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
