my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
