im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
i now understand why vodka
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
