I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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