We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Randomize
