She said her name was "party"
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
