So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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