No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
