We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Dick very happy bro
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
