it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Randomize
