I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
bring money and cleavage
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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