how can u be prego again
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
