Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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