Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
He kissed a someone with a penis
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
