She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
