As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize