4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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